CONSIDERING A NEW CHAPTER?

I hope everyone is having a beautiful holiday season with lots of exhaling, slowing down and/or whatever else you need. Sending love to anyone who might be having a hard time right now.

Are you considering a new and fresh chapter for the new year? Do you ever think about how things can really change for you in a split second? Physically, tangibly and mentally. I recently had a surge of energy for how I want this next chapter to ideally feel and look and the visions have been a little surprising and a different wave from this year for me but the new mindset is refreshing. In order to attract and manifest this I know I need to make many shifts in how I think, how I spend my mornings and days and changes in what and who I give energy to. I briefly mentioned this to my therapist and she said ‘I’m here for it, but just not in a militant way, Shani’. She knows my ass will type up a whole checklist to abide by every single day without hesitation haha.

But I agree with her. And because I don’t want to just write out a bunch of goals and plans to kick into gear as soon as January 1st hits, I’ve been thinking about things and mind shifts that I ultimately want to implement and am going to take it one INTENTIONAL day at a time. I started today:) 

I started thinking through ALL the resources and proven actions that I KNOW will help me with a fresh chapter. Of course I’m sharing because I know some of you are thinking about starting January renewed, starting a new year, new quarter, setting resolutions, goal setting, wanting a little ‘out with the old, in with the new’ vibe. PLEASE DO NOT LET ANYONE OR SOCIAL MEDIA MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE YOU CANNOT START FRESH WITH A NEW YEAR. Fuck that, you can. There is energy swirling with the collective towards a fresh start, take advantage of it. 

As always, take what you need. Do what works for you. And above all else, GIVE YOURSELF GRACE THROUGH THE PROCESS. Perfect doesn't exist. This isn’t an overnight operation. You will take steps forward and steps backwards, and that's okay. 

CONSIDERING BETTER HEALTH + WELLNESS 

Consider those changes to your diet that you know you need to. Make your annual appointments. Start tracking your calories and levels of fat vs. carbs vs. protein on MyFitnessPal. Set a daily water intake goal. Find a therapist on therapyforblackgirls.com or https://therapyforblackmen.org . Find a nutritionist. Baby steps to big steps to life changes. 

CONSIDERING MOVING YOUR BODY 

Yeah, yeah, yeah - for many of us exercise stays on the list of things we need to be consistent with. I prefer to run outside but never in this weather so I started back at the gym recently. Watching shows, movies, live Beyonce videos on YouTube (or Coachella lol) while doing cardio helps me to zone out and not think about the running. I also use the Nike Training App at home, they have SO many workouts for all lengths of time and muscle groups, without/without equipment, even yoga.

CONSIDERING MEDITATION 

I am so thankful that meditation has become a part of my daily life. For anyone who wants to do it more, try the guided meditations on Insight Timer. Here are some of my favorite meditations and many for ‘beginners’:

Learn How To Meditate In Seven Days 

Blessing Your Body, Mind & Spirit 

Any of these from David G

Energy Cleanse: Sacred Waters 

Guided Chakra Healing Meditation 

Honoring Life 

Learning To Surrender 

Morning Ritual 

Learning To Honor Out Rhythms & Cycles 

I also have been doing a monthly online membership for HealHaus. They have about 10 live online classes a day from meditations to yoga to reiki to workshops. It’s been so WORTH it. I fill up my schedule every few days to keep me dedicated to it. 

CONSIDERING MORE MINDFUL MORNINGS 

Starting my day soft helps me remain in that energy throughout the day. When I start rushed, the whole day ends up being at that same pace. Waking up 45 minutes early allows me to move slower, meditate, stretch/do yoga, not be stressed about time, pray etc. 

I always program a cup of tea and wanted to share. It’s like a prayer. I add lemon juice and fresh ginger in warm water (I just bought some probiotic tea bags though that I will start to use too). I sit comfortably and hold the cup in both hands and say something like this: 

I program this cup of tea with the utmost healing and restorative power. I pray that the liquid will swirl throughout my mind to heal any unhealthy thought patterns and self-limiting beliefs. I ask that it swirl throughout my heart and heart space to open, soften and restore any hard layers that have been placed there through protection. I ask that it swirl throughout my stomach and root to eliminate any worry, doubt, fear and anxiety so I may connect with my intuition and be grounded and present. I ask that if there’s anything internally that needs healing that it will heal, anything that needs restoration it will restore and anything that needs to be eliminated it will eliminate. I say thank you now and so it is” 

CONSIDERING LOOKING GOOD TO  FEEL GOOD 

Is this true for you because it is MY TRUTH lol. Whether you’re going to work, running errands or lounging in the house, looking your version of ‘good’ can help your energy so much. Switch up your hair, add some color to your lip. Wear cute pajamas around the house. Lather in body oils. Do skincare. This is true for your home too. Move some of your furniture around to shift the energy. Burn candles. Take yourself out on cute sexy dates. One thing I am incorporating into my life is doing my hair and makeup and arranging fits that feel like my essence. Someone close to me has a store with clean and non-toxic skincare, makeup and wellness products from ALL black, brown and women-owned brands and she does free online consultations if you’re looking to refresh your beauty bag. 

CONSIDERING MODERATION

This is big for me that spans across all areas of life. I told my therapist recently that I am taking a break from dating/seeking out dating and she said “Girl. How are you ever going to practice” and while it was a good kiki laugh, that sunk in for other areas. If there are things you want to STOP doing, consider what it looks like to scale back or do in moderation. For instance, I take social media breaks all the time. When I get back on I eventually end up right back into the mindless scrolling and allowing it to take up a bunch of energy. Instead, I want to try to stay on but get to a place where I can do it in moderation and in the healthy way that I need. Same with liquor. Same with anything else that we want to scale back on. It can actually be harder than going cold turkey, but it can help set longer term shifts that are more permanent. 

CONSIDERING BETTER FINANCES 

Business, finances, credit - all the adulting tings lol. Re-sharing the budget templateI’ve been using for over a decade if not longer. I map this out a year at a time and update/actualize this thing no less than twice a month. Hit me if you need assistance navigating it. 

CONSIDERING TRAVEL 

Traveling this year is a non-negotiable for me this new year. Like, I will go out create these bags so I can be OUT of here lol. If travel is something you always put on the back burner, don’t let this year be another one. Start a savings to fund it. Use one of those interest-free payment plans they offer on Orbitz and the other travel sites like Affirm or After Pay. If it’s something you really want to do, devise yourself a plan! It’s worth the investment. 

CONSIDERING CAREER + EDUCATION MOVES

Whatever you want to do within your career/business this year, baby, DO IT. Make it happen. Manifest it. Pray with diligence. Meet your prayers halfway by doing whatever work you need to. Start logging ALL your accomplishments in a document so you don’t forget things when review time comes or when updating your resume for a new job. Set up job alerts on LinkedIn. Take free classes on HubSpot or Google or learn ANY DAMN THING on YouTube. I’m learning Spanish now on Duolingo to get ready for a trip to Spain lol. Snap into gear for whatever belongs to you and go get it. 

CONSIDERING A SHIFT TOWARDS MORE POSITIVITY 

Sometimes half the battle with any battle is our own energy and mindset. I have recommended this book to I don’t know how many people. It’s very digestible and easy to read but SO good for cultivating positivity in your life. Which is not just fake positivity but real mindset shifts and attracting of all things good. 

CONSIDERING YOUR CIRCLE 

This is sort of all encompassing with all our relationships. Our family, our kids, our friends, our lovers. May we personally evaluate what is working, what’s not and areas of opportunity for more peace in our relationships. Where we need to pour more or pour less. Where we want to show more love because it’s deserved or less because it’s proven nonreciprocal. Where we need to spend more quality time with our people or our children. Where communication is needed and pray for the courage to have those conversations. I’m going to re-read All About Love by bell hooks which is such a dope ASS read about all encompassing love with others, period. 

I will leave you with this: find the life in your life situation(s) - Eckhart Tolle.

While we may be gearing up and excited about turning over a new leaf, let’s not forget to live y’all. Let’s not forget who we already are before the changes. Let’s honor what we’ve been through to get to where we are. Let’s be present and not be pulled heavily into the expectations and the visions of where we want to be. It all can feel like a mess trying to balance getting better with loving who we are, with forgetting the past and the future to be present but never forget that it’s the best thing for us ultimately. And try your best. Come back home whenever, however, through whatever. 

This life shit IS NEVER ENDING until it ends. A forever game. You’re never too far gone.

Think about how you want to feel and map out what’s going to help you feel those feelings. OR think about all the bad feelings you’ve been having this year and switch up the shit you’ve been doing that has caused those feelings. 

SO MUCH LOVE TO CLOSING OUT THE CHAPTER THAT IS 2022 AND BEGINNING A NEW ONE. This had a lot of information, BOOKMARK THE EMAIL. 

Sidenote, for all of you who keep asking 'when is the book coming, sis?' I fuck with y'all, thank you for seeing and speaking that for me, for real. 

SHANI