IT JUST KEEPS GOING

Today I got so emotional thinking about how life just keeps changing and flowing and ushering us forward, constantly. Even when things feel overwhelming. Even when we feel like it’s sweeping us up, it just keeps going. The sun rises then sets so fast. 

We have so many choices when life keeps cycling. We can show up fully or we can let it pull us along. 

We can hide under the covers (literally or figuratively) and refuse to move with it (also, literally or figuratively) and let it leave us behind. For a few days or we can blink and be stuck in the same spot for 10 years.

We can anxiously try to keep ahead of the flow. Through planning and moving quickly and controlling anything we can. This can run us into the ground and destroy our nervous system, leaving us with the heaviest weight on our shoulders. 

We see life in its constant all around us. Our lives are moving, our loved one’s lives are moving. And we just try to keep up while maintaining connections also. 

I find myself in all of these waves and all in all, all is well. But that doesn’t mean there aren’t moments when I just feel like damn, this shit doesn’t STOP, ever. Even when it doesn’t feel bad necessarily. It’s always a new day. Like clock work. 

I love that we do get to be ushered into new chapters and forces that keep us evolving. I do have gratitude that I can live across the spectrum of heavy DOING and heavy BEING. I am happy that life has forced me to continuously level up. 

But today, is transparent grief in not being able to bow out for just a second to stand still in some time. 

I know in my heart, all things work together. I know that these waves are for learning and purpose. I know how to cultivate peace and stillness. I know that the secret to life is through surrender. I know what the opposite of living is. I know that it’s a blessing to see a new day. I have a lot built in my foundation. But I just don’t FEEEEEEL like it. 

Maybe you’re here too. Maybe you’re not but can reference this in a future space. I just wanted to stamp these sentiments as a “I really do feel you”.  And pray that we continue to find our harmony with this life. Each day. Each moment. Each situation. Each new chapter. Each circumstance. Each connection. 

xo, SHANI